Wednesday, 14 September 2011

2128 Timewasters

The writing plan of recording series together or groups of films interspersed with news events and sports is behind schedule with the consequence that I have not worked on the masterpiece for several days although this has given the opportunity to reflect on content as well as style.

There are no masterpieces to report in this piece, sadly the opposite as all three items can be described as time wasters,

The first, the film Jonah Hex was an attempt to bridge several genres including the cinematic comic book, science fiction and western adventure mixed in with the horror occult and fails badly from my viewpoint, that of the critics and at the box office reputedly losing $30 million of the $40 million it took to make.

The black hero, in the sense of darkness, is Jonah Hex, a Confederate Officer who opposed slavery and the decision of his commanding officer to burn a hospital killing the man’s son in the process. Having lost the war and his son the Commanding Officer turns his vengeance first on Hex, burning his wife and child alive which he is tied to a cross and then left to die with his face badly disfigured. He is found by Native Americans and rescued and revived by the medicine men and imparted with a special power which enables him to communicate with the dead and use extraordinary reflexes. He also has a friend who is a creative armourer who makes individual weapons worthy of James Bond and he has a beautiful girlfriend who enjoys her work day profession as a whore.

Hex occupies his time as a preferably dead rather alive bounty hunter and first shoots and then blows up a small town when the Sheriff refuses to pay the bounty for three corpses and a head and generally behaves in such a way as to place a bounty on his own head, Meanwhile the man who murdered his wife and child who he thought dead has been plotting his revenge on the Union by hijacking the parts of a new weapon which together with the help of a scientist appears to have the capacity to deliver tactical atomic bombs in the form of translucent cannon balls. The President and his advises are fearful after a test run of the weapons destroy a civil community over three hundred souls with just one shot landing in the centre of the town just after a church service.

The President decides that only Hex can save the Union from hell on earth and uses the existence of the former Commanding Officer as bait. Hex attempts to locate and destroy the weapon singled handed in advance of the US forces but is mortally wounded in a brave attempt. Once more it is the Native Americans who find and restore the hero. I dozed off around this time and do not know how our hero and the good lady whore managed to get on the iron ship as it made its way into the harbour on July 4th where the President and co were about to celebrate the day but increasingly fearful after the oncoming craft had demolished a battleship waiting for them through using the super weapon

Fortunately hero and wench come to the rescue and prevent disaster. Hero is duly rewarded by President with monetary award and pardon for all his sins and offered the job of national sheriff. He rejects this as doe snot want to work for a boss but offers to return if required signalling the intention of sequel of the public and critical response to the picture had been different. The couple walk to a reality sunset.

The second film is called Smooch and is a made for TV children’s fairy tale based on the Prince who is turned into a frog concept set in present day New York of a widowed mother and daughter living in a middle class standards apartment with mother hiring a succession of live in Nannies to help take care of the daughter when working and going out with a female friend.

The daughter when confronted with dissecting frog at school rescues the creature and deposit in a lake in central park.

Before this the Prince(English) has been bullied by his parents to make an appropriate match to ensure the dynasty much to the horror of the gentleman’s gentleman who presses his master to seek a love match, The Prince having agreed to this parents wishes at a dinner with the future in laws goes off into town to a bar to wager on darts and get drunk resulting in being drunk and dumped off the bridge into the waters edge of the lake only to wake the next day in a semi stupor to find a frog landing on his chest. The lady seeing the young man and not the frog departed into the lake sees this as destiny and carts the Prince back to the apartment on a shopping trolley under the watchful eye of the gentleman’s gentleman. The Prince is also charming and decides that to become the next Nanny is a great way of hiding from his future fate for as long as possible.

I pause to remind myself that this is the second Nanny film is a matter of weeks viewed see The Rebound and where the relationship commences as friendship but the Nanny soon becomes indispensable. In this instance it is the bother/best friend cop of the deceased husband who is suspicious about the new arrival especially as he can find no record which checking the system with the man’s alleged particulars. He alerts the parents and prospective in laws when discovering the true identity and they come to retrieve their possession and he meekly goes off. This is when the Gentleman’s Gentleman steps in and resigns saying he has no wish to continue working in such a situation and that if the Prince has any guts he will abandon his duty and find happiness with the ready made family. This he does so happiness ever after. The reality is the children of 9/11.

Finally Gods of the Arena the Prequel to Spartacus Blood and Sand came to its Bloody end and in fairness the story does have coherence and serious acting and would have been watchable without the graphic cartoon quality of the blood splattering violence and the full frontal nudity and animalistic sex.

The original series Spartacus Blood and Sand, tells how the hero became a slave because of the ambitions of a young Roman Commander with his beloved wife also sold into separate slavery. At first reluctant to train and become a Gladiator Spartacus is persuaded to perform on the basis that the master will find his wife be reunited. Unfortunately the Master’s wife has other plans and persuades her husband to arrange for the death of the woman when she is on her way to Spartacus who has become the toast of the town. Spartacus seeks revenge but meanwhile the Master is gaining his revenge on those in the city who have thwarted or challenged his rise as head gladiator school as well as his social and political ambitions. He gets rid of his former friend and rival Gladiator team owner by framing him for the murder of the Magistrates who had also failed to meet his demands for social promotions.

His wife meanwhile had been conducting a sexual affair with a Gladiator who makes her pregnant which she pretends is the child of her husband. The couple are sexually promiscuous in terms of using their slaves for pleasure although in this instance the couple share the female slaves, although homosexuality is practiced between the male gladiators and between visiting dignitaries who come to enjoy the reputation of the villa for open and free sexuality. In the grand finale Spartacus leads the revolt of the Gladiators and the Slave Master and his wife are killed.

In prequel although called Spartacus Gods of the Arena the six part production explains the events which led to the arrival of Spartacus but also explain something of the background relationships which contributed to subsequent events.

In the provincial City of Capua, Quintus Lentulus Batiatus is the manager of his father’s Gladiator training school at a time when there is just a small dilapidated arena and another school dominates competitions in the city and region. Batiatus takes the opportunity of the absence of his father on health grounds to pursue his ambition of turning the school into the major establishment and which in turn will lead to his main objective which is to achieve political and social power. His wife beautiful wife, Lucretia is just as ambitious and (as in the main series) to be more ruthless and a better schemer. The House has one card to play Gannicus, the best Gladiator in the city and whose reputation has commenced to spread.

Gannicus is close to the former champion Oenomaus who has been allowed to have a slave as his wife and she is exempt from the attentions of Batiatus and visiting guests. Batiatus also invests in a new slave Crixus whose ambition to become the greatest is ridiculed but he attracts the attention of Lucretia.

The “ battleground” for power is set when the city power man Tullius and builder of a great new arena in the style of that still standing in Rome determines that his friend and Training school owner Vettius should have Gannicus. The opening event is planned as a grand occasion and Batiatus is promised an involvement if he sells Gannicus.
In order to pursue his ambition Lucretia and her social well connected separated wife who seeks hospitality waylays a visiting dignitary on his way to meet with the rivals. The House offers to provide anything he wishes for entertainment and this includes watching Gannicus have sexual intercourse before the assembly with the wife of Oenomaus Melitta who Batiatus has appointed Doctore or Gladiator Trainer. Afterwards it is agreed no one will speak of what happens especially to the new Doctore. His wife feels guilty and Gannicus also guilty nevertheless falls in love with the wife of his best friend and is also attracted as a consequence of their enforced and public intimacy. Just when things are beginning to look good for Batiatus his father returns and takes charge once more and agrees to the sale of Gannicus and to elevating Crixus who has immediately commenced to prove his abilities in the arena.

In Beneath the Mask, the use of Masks is a feature of he main series to disguise individuals participating in the sexual orgies, the visiting dignatory demands another session and murders the friend of Lucretia who arranged the meeting, again repeating a situation which occurred in the main series. In this instance the father returns early and reads the riot act to his son, taking over everything himseld, selling Gannicus and generally making life unbearable for the couple who face leaving with as little as they commenced their life together.

In Reckoning Batiatus cannot go through with a plan to kill his father and take full control of the Ludus. However Lucretia has been slowly poisoning the man and gives him a lethal dose in wine which unfortunately Melitta also take and dies when she is having a final goodbye with Gannicus before he is sold.

In the Bitter End Batiatus lays a plot with a friend who pretends to reveal the plan to the opposition as a means of tricking them into a trap. The result is that Tullius is captured and walled up alive in his own stadium while Vettius is offered his life if he cooperates and explains that the owner and organiser of the great opening event has been called away on urgent business and that after the games he is also retiring to live elsewhere and has sold (given) his Ludus not to Batiatus as planned but to Batiatus friend, who becomes a rival in the main series and which in turn leads to his downfall.

One of the complaints of his father against Batiatus is that not only was his wife Lucretia a commoner of well known easy virtue but she remained childless. In order to try and placate the father Lucretia devised the plan to mate with Crixus but in the main series she not only become dependent on the relationship but is successful in becoming pregnant by him. Gannicus is also successful in the arena and is given his freedom which means he can avoid admitting to Doctore the extent of his misery with the death of Melitta. Thus it would appear almost everything goes well for Batiatus as the mini series ends. However before his death by walling, Tullius issues a curse, a curse which comes to fruition with their deaths at the hands of Crixus and Spartacus at the end of the main series and which is repeated.

A special word for the actor John Hannah who plays Batiatus and who gives the performance of his life throughout both series.

No comments:

Post a Comment