On Wednesday evening I watched the first of what should become six interesting programmes contrasting living in a 21st century "advanced" democracy with living in a contemporary primitive society. In this instance the individual, all will be female, has a comfortable middle class existence as a single person living on her own, filling her life from just after dawn until just before midnight but with a self aware sense that she was filling in her day to mask the void within herself.
She lived for a month on a small island one mile by half a mile with a community of 800 whose life appeared to revolve around each other as a nuclear and extended families and with a shared culture which involved the form of dress and personal appearance, daily activities and routines and special events, over one month of the stay with the initial assistance of a male interpreter and a cameraman/camera team whose gender/s was not disclosed.
The importance of this programme and one can assume the series is its focus on the personal impact of immersing oneself as much as it is ever possible to do so in a very different culture over an intense but comparatively short period of time.
The first thing that has to be said is that it is possible to gain the same level of insight and perspective in a number of ways such as a retreat as part of a religious order, and which has previously been covered by TV, and is something that has been undertaken by individuals for varying periods of time through the existence of religious communities. Another approach is the short established educational experience which in my instance involved a one month management course amongst individuals whose way of life and daily experience was vastly different from my own. The basic ingredient therefore is living alone or within a nuclear family and then living in a communal environment in which you are required to sacrifice your individuality and freedoms to conform to the requirements of the group or large community. The experience becomes an effective examination of yourself as well as of the group although most people will need help to place the experience in a proper perspective and not get things out of proportion. By all means go off on holiday and indulge in the holiday romance or whatever but they are rarely experiences upon which to base a marriage, adopting a new language and culture and abandoning everything in your life until then.
It was evident that in this instance, the programme makers had gone to considerable trouble to match the subject with someone who would provide, however briefly, the maternal care she had missed in her life as what we saw concentrated on a relationship between a grandmother and the subject, although it was also evident that the grandfather also took considerable interest in promoting the welfare of the young woman who they treated as a daughter and in fact the programme suggested that the subject was able to fill the void in the life of grandmother as her own children had grown up and had their own lives, and indeed the programme made the point that the sons were no longer living on the island.
The core story was that at the age of thirteen the young woman's parents had divorced and that she had been asked in confidence which parent she wished to live and had then been asked to repeat her wishes in the court. She had chosen her father and on return her mother had said that she never wished to see her again and walked out of the house the following day and they had not had contact since. She had felt she had been rejected by her mother, although the reality was she had rejected her mother, although it has to be stressed it was an impossible situation for any child especially a thirteen year old and the greater responsibility rests with the parents who could not find a way of healing their relationship to the extent of providing a good family umbrella for their child. Nor do siblings necessarily fill the gaps, providing the relationship and the comfort when there is more than one child in the family and so much depends on the rest of the family structure of grandparents and uncles, aunts and cousins.
Although they could not communicate through language and although their educational and social experiences were so different, a close bond developed between the two women and it was the islander who appeared to quickly understand the predicament of the modern westerner and suggest meaningful remedies On being requested to assist with the daily chores the young woman had thrown herself into task with such prolonged enthusiasm that it was evident the community and the woman feared that their roles and daily lives were being misrepresented and she was effectively ordered to slow down and to sit for hours at a time, undertaking precise needlework. The best observation was when the grandmother commented that the young woman was constantly laughing but this was a cover of the real mixed feelings beneath, although this did not prevent the headman and the grandmother selecting a community name which meant of sunshine. The insight was also demonstrated by the seriousness with the grandparent couple took the disclosure that the young woman was having nightmares which involved violence and death and where at one point the concern was such that the grandfather went off to the mainland to collect "medicine" to prevent the bad spirits from continuing to threaten their adopted, albeit temporary, daughter.
The programme was not a social documentary or study as such with much overlooked, intentionally unstated, or if it was covered it did not register with me at that the time, such as the economic base of this community, the education system and the impact of that system on the younger generation especially in relation to the fundamental question of spiritual beliefs and religion. There was no reference during the programmes to God or Gods but to good and bad spirits. The community had a large number of carved wood images, good spirits who came to life and protected them while they slept and who would be aroused by blowing the smoke of burning cocoa beans on to them. When it was evident that someone was being troubled by bad spirits, such as the young woman, the priority was to find the right defences to stop them doing the subject real harm. It did not matter what was actually done but the extent of concern and willingness to put oneself out to help came across as the most effective medicine.
There were warning signals that the experience was acting like a Pandora's box for the young woman. In order to mark her departure the community put on a social in which men and woman got drunk separately in a kind of boys and girls night in a separate bar in the Bigg market or Quayside in Newcastle, at the end of which the men joined in and carted off the women to their hammocks, that is the women's hammocks, for a night of passion. The western young woman appeared to be sufficient concerned at this possibility that although she drank the special home made brew and smoked the pipe to enhance the effects she did not give herself to the dancing frenzy, (on camera at least) nor were we shown the men carrying of the women to the night of passion. There is no doubt however that without the camera's and chaperones the eligible young men some who appear no more than teenagers would have competed for her, egged on by the community elders of both sexes. The programme did not mention what happens when individuals become seriously ill or give birth, although she was taken to visit the burial ground of the family ancestors. The usual mode of travel to and from the island was by canoe
This of course was only half a programme. The other half should be made five years afterwards about whether the retreat had any lasting effect on her and on her temporary mother surrogate. Will they keep in touch and would she ever go back? Hopefully the world will not now descend on this community and they will be left to continue as before, if that it was what they wish although I have so many questions such as do they have divorce and who looks after the children? Are the children given any choice in the matter? Is here crime on the island and how is this dealt with. Can you remain part of the community without accepting the authority of the elders? Who owns the island and the individual properties?
She lived for a month on a small island one mile by half a mile with a community of 800 whose life appeared to revolve around each other as a nuclear and extended families and with a shared culture which involved the form of dress and personal appearance, daily activities and routines and special events, over one month of the stay with the initial assistance of a male interpreter and a cameraman/camera team whose gender/s was not disclosed.
The importance of this programme and one can assume the series is its focus on the personal impact of immersing oneself as much as it is ever possible to do so in a very different culture over an intense but comparatively short period of time.
The first thing that has to be said is that it is possible to gain the same level of insight and perspective in a number of ways such as a retreat as part of a religious order, and which has previously been covered by TV, and is something that has been undertaken by individuals for varying periods of time through the existence of religious communities. Another approach is the short established educational experience which in my instance involved a one month management course amongst individuals whose way of life and daily experience was vastly different from my own. The basic ingredient therefore is living alone or within a nuclear family and then living in a communal environment in which you are required to sacrifice your individuality and freedoms to conform to the requirements of the group or large community. The experience becomes an effective examination of yourself as well as of the group although most people will need help to place the experience in a proper perspective and not get things out of proportion. By all means go off on holiday and indulge in the holiday romance or whatever but they are rarely experiences upon which to base a marriage, adopting a new language and culture and abandoning everything in your life until then.
It was evident that in this instance, the programme makers had gone to considerable trouble to match the subject with someone who would provide, however briefly, the maternal care she had missed in her life as what we saw concentrated on a relationship between a grandmother and the subject, although it was also evident that the grandfather also took considerable interest in promoting the welfare of the young woman who they treated as a daughter and in fact the programme suggested that the subject was able to fill the void in the life of grandmother as her own children had grown up and had their own lives, and indeed the programme made the point that the sons were no longer living on the island.
The core story was that at the age of thirteen the young woman's parents had divorced and that she had been asked in confidence which parent she wished to live and had then been asked to repeat her wishes in the court. She had chosen her father and on return her mother had said that she never wished to see her again and walked out of the house the following day and they had not had contact since. She had felt she had been rejected by her mother, although the reality was she had rejected her mother, although it has to be stressed it was an impossible situation for any child especially a thirteen year old and the greater responsibility rests with the parents who could not find a way of healing their relationship to the extent of providing a good family umbrella for their child. Nor do siblings necessarily fill the gaps, providing the relationship and the comfort when there is more than one child in the family and so much depends on the rest of the family structure of grandparents and uncles, aunts and cousins.
Although they could not communicate through language and although their educational and social experiences were so different, a close bond developed between the two women and it was the islander who appeared to quickly understand the predicament of the modern westerner and suggest meaningful remedies On being requested to assist with the daily chores the young woman had thrown herself into task with such prolonged enthusiasm that it was evident the community and the woman feared that their roles and daily lives were being misrepresented and she was effectively ordered to slow down and to sit for hours at a time, undertaking precise needlework. The best observation was when the grandmother commented that the young woman was constantly laughing but this was a cover of the real mixed feelings beneath, although this did not prevent the headman and the grandmother selecting a community name which meant of sunshine. The insight was also demonstrated by the seriousness with the grandparent couple took the disclosure that the young woman was having nightmares which involved violence and death and where at one point the concern was such that the grandfather went off to the mainland to collect "medicine" to prevent the bad spirits from continuing to threaten their adopted, albeit temporary, daughter.
The programme was not a social documentary or study as such with much overlooked, intentionally unstated, or if it was covered it did not register with me at that the time, such as the economic base of this community, the education system and the impact of that system on the younger generation especially in relation to the fundamental question of spiritual beliefs and religion. There was no reference during the programmes to God or Gods but to good and bad spirits. The community had a large number of carved wood images, good spirits who came to life and protected them while they slept and who would be aroused by blowing the smoke of burning cocoa beans on to them. When it was evident that someone was being troubled by bad spirits, such as the young woman, the priority was to find the right defences to stop them doing the subject real harm. It did not matter what was actually done but the extent of concern and willingness to put oneself out to help came across as the most effective medicine.
There were warning signals that the experience was acting like a Pandora's box for the young woman. In order to mark her departure the community put on a social in which men and woman got drunk separately in a kind of boys and girls night in a separate bar in the Bigg market or Quayside in Newcastle, at the end of which the men joined in and carted off the women to their hammocks, that is the women's hammocks, for a night of passion. The western young woman appeared to be sufficient concerned at this possibility that although she drank the special home made brew and smoked the pipe to enhance the effects she did not give herself to the dancing frenzy, (on camera at least) nor were we shown the men carrying of the women to the night of passion. There is no doubt however that without the camera's and chaperones the eligible young men some who appear no more than teenagers would have competed for her, egged on by the community elders of both sexes. The programme did not mention what happens when individuals become seriously ill or give birth, although she was taken to visit the burial ground of the family ancestors. The usual mode of travel to and from the island was by canoe
This of course was only half a programme. The other half should be made five years afterwards about whether the retreat had any lasting effect on her and on her temporary mother surrogate. Will they keep in touch and would she ever go back? Hopefully the world will not now descend on this community and they will be left to continue as before, if that it was what they wish although I have so many questions such as do they have divorce and who looks after the children? Are the children given any choice in the matter? Is here crime on the island and how is this dealt with. Can you remain part of the community without accepting the authority of the elders? Who owns the island and the individual properties?
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